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buttes #cockes
<@wilder> capitalism is more like a heat pump in that respect
<@wilder> it uses resources to funnel unhappiness from america to poor countries that we fuck
<@wilder> leaving america with net happiness
buttes #cockes
<mikael> fuck I hate nerds
<a43> mikael is the irc version of the self-hating jew
<mikael> ew, I'm not a nerd
<zam> -mikael- VERSION rcirc on GNU Emacs 22.0.51.1
<zam> EXPOSED
irc.buttes.org #onebutan
<@mroach> we need a new hitler-like figure to purge europe of a) blacks b) muslims
<@mroach> why solve a problem that you can more easily eliminate
buttes #cockes
<Al> bruce willis piss party
<rolloffle> I am fuckin' hungry
<Gudrow> i am about to luncheon
<sam> i am eating oatmeals
<Gudrow> i am going to eat soups
<rolloffle> i am going to choke a bitch
<engimo> i am eating hot pockets
<evilpie> bruce
<evilpie> willis
<evilpie> piss
<evilpie> party
<sam> cream of sumblakbrit
buttes #cockes
<Kalle> huh I am your typical asthma-wheezing allergic boy with glasses
<Kalle> I am piggy from lord of the flies
<fi> SUCKS TO YER ASS-PERGS
buttes #sass
<Deckard> way back in the day when i was in high school there was this fat guy who ripped off kurt vonnegut in creative writing class, like nobody's ever read vonnegut
<Deckard> i can just see him being like, a-ha, the perfect crime
<Deckard> then this other guy sat behind him in math and said "vonnegut" over and over again until he stormed out of class and went to the bathroom to cry
<@Kosher|WORK> Taylor Devices, Inc. stock is up 26.37% today
<@Kosher|WORK> The earthquake protection technology company saw a surge in demand from countries affected by the earthquake and tsunami that hammered south Asia
<@zenwhen> omg
<@zenwhen> Im going to sell dicke insurance
<@zenwhen> :)
<@zenwhen> and then run around chopping off pee pees
<@zenwhen> so people will be like
<@zenwhen> I didnt think I needed it
<@zenwhen> but wow
<@zenwhen> let me in on dicke insurance
buttes #cockes
<rolloffle> <mikael> huh I mailed the swedish state pharmacy monopoly and was like "Hello, your lowest-strength benzoyl peroxide solution is 5%, but here is a medical study showing that 2.5% solutions are as effective but less irritating, please consider buying some"
<rolloffle> <mikael> and they were like "huh w/e"
<rolloffle> notice the typical mikael strategy of asking someone else to do something unnecessary
<rolloffle> when he could just buy the 5% solution and mix it with water
<engimo> WHAT?!
<rolloffle> it's a difficult plan to pull off, I admit
<nat_> Ok, following a link labeled "girl with gorgeous body sucks a huge cock" and seeing pics of a homely chick and a tiny penis makes me wonder about the endowment of the webmaster who linked it
Evolnet
<cyberdyne> 13/F/BRASIL HERE
<cyberdyne> LOW MILEAGE
<Dessimat0r> LOL
<Dessimat0r> 1/F/UK
<cyberdyne> lol
<Dessimat0r> I CANT TYPE THAT WELL I DONT HAVE MUCH FINGERS YET
<cyberdyne> do u have dink
<Dessimat0r> YES BUT THE BALLS ARE STILL INSIDE AND IT IS TINY
<Dessimat0r> ALSO I CANNOT GET AN ERRECTION
<Dessimat0r> IF YOU COME TO MY HOUSE AND PICK ME UP IN MY CRIB WE CAN GO SOMEWHERE AND HAVE SEXUAL FUN XX
buttes #cockes
<olli-pekka> penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis
<olli-pekka> did you know
<olli-pekka> that i typed out
<olli-pekka> all those penises
<olli-pekka> MY SELF
<olli-pekka> GOD I JUST WANT TO GNAW AND SUCK ON THE GAY COCKEHEAD OMFG >:O >:O
<rolloffle> olli-pekka: I think I've pinpointed the cause of your girl problems
<olli-pekka> rolloffle: i am not gay
<olli-pekka> rolloffle: what is the cause? (i am not a faggot)
<rolloffle> olli-pekka: I'm thinking "faggotry"
buttes #cockes
<darren_> hmm
<darren_> lots of my applications are 'quitting unexpectedly'
<weasel> well i guess by now you're expecting it
<rolloffle> I gave a speech in 7th grade about how much I hated Bill Cosby. I guess I did it because I didn't have a real speech topic and was just trying to be funny. I talked about how his pudding commercials were terrible and he was overshadowed in his sitcom by Theo.
<rolloffle> I got so much flak for being racist that week that it was unbelievable. All I said was that his pudding commercials sucked, and everyone assumed it was because he was black. That was almost 9 years ago and I still get comments on it to this day.
<EV1-KiSSy> it's becuz pudding is black, like bill cosby
Evolnet
<JacksonBrown> L O L, Debian unstable
<JacksonBrown> LOL
<godspeed> jacksonbrown: what?
<godspeed> i run it
<godspeed> it's fine
<godspeed> os[Linux 2.6.5-grsec - Debian testing/unstable] up[ 1 hours, 49 minutes] cpu[AMD Athlon(tm) processor, 1397.468 MHz (2752.51 bogomips)] mem[ 499.44/503.46 MB (99.2%)] video[nVidia Corporation NV17 [GeForce4 MX 440] (rev 163). at 1600x1200 (24 bits)]
<rolloffle>
<godspeed> os[Linux 2.6.5-grsec - Debian testing/unstable] up[ 1 hours, 49 minutes]
<rolloffle> HOW APT
<rolloffle> ZING
<godspeed> rolloffle: stfu
<rolloffle> godspeed: THAT WAS A BRILLIANT ZINGER ON TWO LEVELS
<BrianF> HAHA
<rolloffle> BrianF: GEDDIT? "APT"?
<godspeed> i hate you
buttes #cockes
<@eam> fuck you guys are little internet hitlers
Comment: eam, totally unaware of telecom monopolies, loses an argument. [:10bux: says abez submitted this one, liberal that he is -- Ed]
Evolnet
<timecop> -!- mode/#politics [+b *!*@producto-valvo.com] by coppertop, traveller, starly
<timecop> LAWLZ
<timecop> 3 bans at once
<timecop> hardcore
synirc #yospos
<@DjLizard> I'm freakin out man
<+fishmech> turns on police lights asks you to pull over
<@DjLizard> *eats entire bag of shrooms and 5 pages of acid*
<@acker> you are freakin out. man.
<+fishmech> pulls out the police bong
<@DjLizard> *eats own face*
<@acker> assault on precinct 420
<@sney> sir do you know how STONED you were going
buttes #cockes
<riffic> ripper should have turned on his fucking webcam
<riffic> he didn't have a webcam on
<rolloffle> riffic, he had a webcam
<riffic> i was in #shroomery when ripper offed himself
<riffic> it wasn't on
<riffic> it was my birthday too
<riffic> i was out getting drunk
buttes #cockes
<Kalle> I would like to try morphine
<Kalle> how can I get some of that shit
<Kalle> does any dealer even sell morphine
<incog> kalle, it is much harder to find, try k first
<rolloffle> Kalle: do you know any old people doctors?
<rolloffle> more specifically, do you know any old people doctors by the name of "Shipman"?
<incog> ja, old peoples homes stock morphine so they can make the last days of death better, and they are never that well secured
<Kalle> what the fuck. I worked at an old peoples home
<Kalle> why did I not know this
<incog> it is not untrue at all, all you have to do is defeat a padlock on the medcine chest
<Kalle> fuck I hated those old people
<Kalle> they all hated me because I was young. I was the best worker ever, because I wished almost all of them death intensely
buttes #cockes
<jnz> i'm going to start a collection of beer cans on this shelf in my room
<jnz> so far i've got 2 budweiser and a bud light
<jnz> it's going to be awesome
<jnz> people will be like "this guy drinks beer" and i'll point my finger at them and be like "you know it!" and then we will high five and maybe have a beer
<pamplmoose> o a new yoshi's island game is coming out
<rolloffle> "yoshi" more like "game for mentally-handicapped 4-year-olds"
<pamplmoose> so are you pre ordering it
Buttesnet #cockes
<sma> catbus has tons of old ide drives filled with encrypted child pornography
<Catbus> i can see five from where i am sitting
< puntme> http://img.waffleimages.com/75d8ae8f3381aa2ce7d916840aad3b697d33b4de/080326UZ.jpg
< puntme> fashion goons day out
<@jre> gayer than the blackest nigger's chest covered with the thickest, whitest cum
<@Al> what is that
<@jre> cum is the stuff that comes out of a man's penis
<@Al> no that photo
buttesnet #sass
<eloH> let's just say im an internet hero... fyad legend... heh
<eloH> ill let the cat outa the bag
Buttesnet #onebutan
<@stabby> STEVE FUKKEN JOBS IN THE HIZZOUSE
< sonatinas> his wife looks young
<@stabby> she was engineered by jon ives
<@BonzoESC> jon ives would eliminate seams and slots
<@BonzoESC> if jon ives designed girls they'd be cylinders with rounded edges
<@BonzoESC> haha but on the plus side they would all be white
buttesnet #onebutan
<popeye> afed likes to compare real important nwo activities with nonsense like upside down electrical outlets
buttes #cockes
<mroach> funny how the verification time window for HIV and pregnancy are the same
<mroach> conclusion: pregnancy is a fatal disease
<Al> good thing mroach will never be guilty of transmitting it
<Al> although he sure looks like a long-term sufferer
buttesnet #cockes
<friggy> itchy balls are the worst
<friggy> especially when they itch because the recently shaven hair is returning as stubble
<KosherSalami> i hope you get an ingrown ball-hair
<KosherSalami> that turns in to a cyst
<friggy> i've had that before actually
<friggy> never on the balls though
<friggy> my god if they had to lance that shit
<friggy> i'd just be like 'no im going to keep him'
Evolnet
<incog> at a lanparty i gradually turned the the brightness of my mates monitor up everytime he left the room... then threw a flashbang infront of him
buttes #cockes
<Winkie> the fuck is POZ cum
<io> Winkie: you don't know what poz cum is?
<Winkie> io: apparantly
<io> Winkie: it's a collegic term
<io> like cum laude
<io> poz cum laude
<Winkie> i'm sure
buttes #cockes
<Al> my dogs chased an arab last night
<Al> it was fucking hysterical
<Al> i wish i'd had a camera
<Al> we turned a corner and there was this raghead, presumably off the army base
<Al> and he took one look at the dogs and screamed like a little girl and took off
<Al> and my dogs thought it was some kind of game and ran after him
<Al> and chased him round the field
<Al> we were all pissing ourselves laughing
<Al> fucking funniest shit ever
Comment: #cockes: bastion of cultural sensitivity
buttesnet #cockes
<Mr_X> i like it that now when people have to differentiate between the two different kinds of indians they say "casino" and "tech support"
Evolnet
<Dessimat0r> your science is bullshit
<Dessimat0r> Star Trek is REAL science
<Dessimat0r> your science is bullshit
<Dessimat0r> Star Trek is REAL science
buttesnet
< moira__> the beer was free, the liquor wasn't but it was cheap supposedly
< moira__> I didn't drink
buttesnet #cockes
<Al> ahahah the creation museum finally opened
<Al> And now the dream is a reality, and pigfucking retards from all over the nation can drive to the Creation Museum and unlearn things they probably didn't even know to begin with.
<Al> And yes, there is a snack bar. Noah's Cafe.
<Al> i imagine it only serves meat dishes
<Al> buy one, get one free
< ctz> ScheisseGern: you should start whattimeisit.org which would be a wiki where people edit the time if it's not right
buttesnet
<incog> On VH1's Freakiest Concert Moments, Allin's final show ranked at number four.
<incog> what the fuck was #1
buttes
<ScheisseGern> reagan denied the CDC money to investigate HIV for years
<ScheisseGern> because it was a 'gay disease'
<ScheisseGern> and his friends in the moral majority didn't want it looking like reagan wanted to help the fags
<ScheisseGern> so he willingly ignored this massive epidemic that was spreading
<ScheisseGern> he didn't even acknowledge it publicly until like 1988
<ScheisseGern> i basically blame him for a lot of death
<a43> ScheisseGern: lol this is what you get when you elect actors for government
<ScheisseGern> there's an actor running california right now
<ScheisseGern> and he's fucking usless :(
<a43> ScheisseGern: also mayor/congressman sonny bono
<a43> next you'll have stifler from american pie as senator
buttes #cockes
<Gudrow> i saw a tux racer arcade machine while i was on vacation
<Bonezer> Gudrow: i saw one at disneyworld
<Bonezer> i was kinda hoping the Tux Racer would be the one game at disneyquest that actually cost money to play
Evolnet
<Neo> HAPPT JEW YEAR
<incog> HAPPY JEW FEAR!
<Neo> Did you do anytnhing?
<Neo> anything*
<incog> yeah, won 2 pub quizes
<incog> because im probably the only person in bradford that knows crabs have 10 legs and the difference between monkeys and apes are apes dont have tails
<incog> lol, its easier when you have lots of people to text and your phone is on silent... but I didnt tell you that
<incog> i had to leave early though, all the chavs were pestering me to donate all my winnings to the tsunami victims... well they had a bucket that said donations... but I could tell it was just to feed their burberry habits
buttesnet #cockes
<@olli-pekka> fuk
<@olli-pekka> i just loaded mine fridge with beer
<@olli-pekka> now i have all this food and i have no idea where to put it
<@olli-pekka> D;
<@afed> hahaha
<@afed> i'm laughing at your misfortune
<@Gudrow> i am also enjoying the comedy of your situation
<@afed> now you have no choice but to have a wonderful feast or get drunk
<@afed> what a terrible situation for you
<@olli-pekka> w/e
<@olli-pekka> i jsut realized its freezing outside
<@olli-pekka> i am going to bag up the food and throw it onto my balcony
buttes #cockes
<hello> Gudrow: snakes on a plane is prty much the best movie ever made
<Gudrow> eh
<Gudrow> i'll wait for video, i think
<hello> dude
<hello> you have to see it in the theater
<hello> otherwise it'd be gay as hel
<Gudrow> 'otherwise'?
<hello> yeah
<hello> because in the theater the audience is really into it and applauding and cheering
<hello> it's a pretty awesome experience 8)
<Gudrow> i can just go to the local ghetto theatre where they do that for every movie
<@CaptainPsyko> The only latex I use comes in a 1 inch square package.
<BonzoESC> lol for you more like 1mm square
<@io_burn> UUUUU
<@io_burn> LLLL
<@io_burn> TTTT
<@io_burn> RRRR
<@io_burn> AAAA
<@io_burn> snap
buttesnet
<vxp> bbs documentary guy got dysentry http://ascii.textfiles.com/archives/2458
<vxp> pretty sure it's impossible to get dysentry in 2010 unless you're a goon
<vxp> or foreign
<incog> archive those infected stools
buttesnet
<popeye> i took a shit the other day and it burned coming out, and i got it smeared all over my ass and my ass got all inflamed too
buttesnet #onebutan
<@bonzo> haha it would be fun to beat san andreas in sam mode: only bike or walk unless you have no choice
<@engimo> lol
<@engimo> and be resentful towards drivers at all times